This is my 26^th year in education. About six years ago, I was a teacher and dean at a Washoe County School District alternative school, working with students and families who often had a history of negative interactions and experiences with the education system. A colleague told me about a  Parent Teacher Home Visits training, and I decided to attend. That one time, I immediately felt like I really liked the idea and I could give it a try.

I recruited my buddy to join me. We did 42 visits that year. We did every single one together. It was just us; nobody else at the school was doing them at the time. We hit the ground like jet fire. We would do two or three in a day. We were single then, but I would plot them out so we would go into neighborhoods in North Reno and then to South. But that’s how I was introduced to PTHV, and once we started it, we fell in love with it that first year.

It’s hard to know where to start when it comes to sharing my memories of home visits. I have so much to share. They are all so interesting and unique and fun and loving. One that comes to mind is a time when our PTHV coordinator asked if I’d be interested in going on a visit with an administrator, someone who wasn’t in the schools daily, so they could get to know what they were all about. Turns out it was with our new superintendent (Kristen McNeill).

We were going to see a high school sophomore and his mom, and the mom worked for the district in the food services department. So we had the superintendent, myself, and another teacher. It was in a tough part of town, not for me but for many. We drove up there, and we had the best visit. It went probably an hour and 15 minutes because it felt like a family dinner. We didn’t eat anything, but it was so much conversation. It wasn’t awkward with everyone’s hands folded. But like at a family dinner, there were three conversations going on at each moment because everybody was interested in each person.

Our superintendent immediately understood what we were trying to accomplish with Parent Teacher Home Visits and the results we were seeking. I asked the student about his hopes and dreams, and the other teacher shared hopes and dreams for the student. And then, the superintendent turns to the mom and asks, “What are your hopes and dreams for your child?” It brought tears to her eyes. The mom hesitated at first and then opened up about wanting her child to go to college, maybe a two-year college, get a good job, and be successful. It was such a special, full-circle moment for everyone in the room to be there talking about their hopes and dreams for that one student. He’d never experienced anything like that. That was a special one for me because I could see what a difference it was making.

I worked at a school, Washoe Inspire Academy, where not one of those children at our school wanted to be there. Not one of them chose to come to our school. They had to. There were behavioral issues; they’d done something they shouldn’t have. They might have been in trouble with the law, but sometimes it was a minor infraction, like breaking a school rule, that by Nevada law would have them come to us for half a year or an entire year.

So you can imagine what it’s like. Truthfully, although none of the students wanted to be there, once they got to know the staff, they loved us. And we did Parent Teacher Home Visits like it was going out of style. I mean, everybody: probably 95% of our students that came through our doors there would have a visit. It was a big part of what we did.

We had two principals while I was there, and I stayed in touch with them. They would both say to me, “I don’t know what you’re doing but keep going because these home visits are spoken about at other meetings.” We’d become known for this. For our students, who didn’t want to be there, we would introduce ourselves through Parent Teacher Home Visits. And it opened all the doors for education with the kids, the families, and the school. It was really neat.

I’ve been a teacher, a dean, a mentor, a coach, a brother, a son, all those things. I’ve become really good at observing and taking note of people’s thoughts and feelings. The first Aha moment with home visits came right at the beginning when I first started them. I saw our students place more value in school. They cared more. There was less tagging and even less cursing in school. They knew we cared. We showed we cared because they saw us out and about in the community. They saw us giggling and going out of our comfort zones into their homes. They saw us asking questions about them, about things we never discussed in school.

There was a time when a student got in trouble one day. He’d cursed out a teacher, but we had a home visit that day at his home. I told him that he needed to change his behavior but that I wouldn’t bring up what happened in school that day just because that’s not what the home visit was about. We weren’t going to talk about school stuff. We were there for everyone to get to know each other. He was very nervous, but the home visit went well. The next day at school, he was golden. He knew I could be trusted. And this happened many times with other students. But us going out into the community, showing that we were human just like them made the kids value what we were doing in the school and in the community.

Home visits made me better. It’s polished off the edges and made me more patient and more understanding. I’ve always tried to get to know my students, but Parent Teacher Home Visits allowed me to get even better. It’s placed even more arrows in my quiver. I’ve learned so much from PTHV trainers and staff that have helped me approach situations differently. Before, when faced with a difficult issue, I might have had one or two ideas for how to deal with them. After practicing home visits, it’s opened my eyes to so many ways to be a better educator, a better community member, and a better human.

And the impact on the school was incredible too. In addition to the students understanding the value of education and trusting the teachers, the communication between teachers and students got better. It used to be that students would come in and take their frustrations out on us. After they started getting home visits, they didn’t want to hurt us anymore. They started coming in and greeting us, “Morning, Tyler, how are you? Did you go hiking with your dogs over the weekend?” They knew me. And so did their parents. Attendance improved, and parents would reach out more.

I wish Parent Teacher Home Visits were practiced in every district in every state. I would love to see it as a vehicle teachers use to understand and get out of their own implicit bias. And I would love for educators to understand that home visits are just as much about them as they are about the kids. It’s 50/50. If we’re stuck in our ways, we’re not learning anymore. Sometimes, the issues are with us, the teachers, the principal, the school, and home visits make it clear what we need to do to help a student succeed.